Jose McBeandip

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Greatest Work in Human History
In the late 2000's Jose McBeandip made his debut in the WWF in a Triple Threat Steel Cage match between himself, The Hitcher and "The Shitman" John Cena In the match, The Hitcher nearly beat John Cena to death while Jose slowly waddled around the ring, saying "I'm gonna fuck you up" to no one in particular and after about 5 minutes he escaped the cage while The Hitcher was more interested in murdering Cena. The Match was universally hailed as the greatest match to ever happen with humans, Jose retired exactly 5 minutes later and was made a legend right away, The WWE changed his contract to a legend's deal right away and he was a shoe in for the next years hall of fame, but got snubbed. Furrious about being snubbed for Gordon Solie, he decided to crash the induction ceremony by letting a hord of meth addicted eagles into the building and attacked everyone on stage, one eagle pecked out the eyes of Gordon Solie's corpse, after Vince McMahon thought it was a good idea to dig him up and sit his body on stage. After the carnage, Jose McBeandip stole Gordon Solie's Hall of Fame ring and ran away, because of his legend status, the WWE didn't do anything to punish Jose for this, which angered the senile Billy Graham who legitimately thought Jose McBeandip was a 7 foot tall green alien who's real name was Susan, despite the madness of this claim, Billy managed to convince a local Klu Klux Klan rally to believe him and join a crusade against Jose McBeandip, which lead to the death of 78 men and 6 niggers.

Many years later, Jose returned to the WWF and appraoched the Road Dogg at a smackdown show and told him he wants to come out of retirement for one night to fight him, Road Dogg was honored by his request and accepted, he rushed down to the ring but after waiting in the ring for around 3 minutes, an announcement that Jose McBeandip had gone back into retirement and won't be competing that night, in his place, D-Lo Brown was selected to fight the Road Dogg but on the way to the ring he snapped his neck and died, after he was strectered off to the back, the Wraith Chris Benoit was then picked to face Road Dogg and in the match, Benoit ripped Road Dogg's head off with his bare hands and threw it into the crowd before disappearing in a cloud of fire and red smoke.

Debt With the Cartel


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